Sunny Days

Tough Week

Alright, so today is friday! yay that should excite me but it doesn't really - thursdays are my favorite days - but anyways this week - Monday was my day off from classes and that is the day i usually get alot of homework done, i have the apartment to myself etc so it's cool - but my friend Tasia and I went to a nearby town Paramatta to go get our work visa labels put on our passports - so we got there okay found the place, it was a really quick process, and then we were just waiting for the bus to come back home when we got a text saying that we could go out to Macquerie University (which is the university that we are doing our weekly ministry on) and help out with our booth for their orientation week - we were originally told that it was from 3-6pm but when we got the text it said it was from 10-4pm - so we were in Paramatta and had no idea how to get to this campus, but the bus/train station was right up the road so we went there and finally through a series of people found that we could take a train and then a bus to get there, so we found it okay - we got there about noon - we helped out until 3:30pm and then got a ride home and i was exhausted and a little bit frustrated because you know "I" had my day planned - so i laid down for a bit realized i wasn't going to sleep and then decided just to get up and have some coffee and get working on some homework - and you know what? i was so productive in those 2-3 hours that i worked on my assignment - when you put God first and really sacrifice "your" time to do what he is calling you to do, he lines everything else up, he knew that i wanted to get through that assignment and on top of helping me get a lot done on it, my attitude was changed, i never understood how to really do the assignment before, i didn't like it and i was having a hard time with it and when i sat down to do it, it just made sense to me, and i got a lot done - it was so cool - so why the title "tough week" all seems well - good start to the week - i don't know - tuesdays and wednesdays are long days for me and i haven't particularly liked my classes all that much, they're okay but they weren't all that interesting to me at this point - things i guess just started bombarding me - like i wanted to go to the gym, but didn't have the energy because of the long days, then all the assignments we have to do, to keep on top of them and i was feeling like i hadn't had a chance to just hang out with people, but i didn't make time either because i was so concerned about getting assignments done and then my OSAP loans are taking forever to get here, my own fault and so my own stress, but when you are living a bazillion miles from home and are running out of money and don't have a job, i'm sorry but you do just start to worry naturally, but i know that God will provide, things will work out, they always do and so i will be fine but up until tonight it was all head knowledge and i didn't believe it in my heart - and then just a thing that might sound ridiculous to most people but to me it's been an ongoing thing and well when you first start working out at a gym, your muscles get a big bigger the first couple of weeks and then they start going down - i got my body fat percent and weight taken and fitness tests done and they said i was doing very well for my age etc, and so that didn't help this week and my clothes aren't fitting because of the added muscle so that's been bothering me this week - so i just kinda had a meltdown tonight at Powerhouse, but it was nice to just let it all out because i think until tonight i hadn't really identified what was bothering me - it's so hard being here and trying to develop close relationships because they take time and i want someone i can just be myself and share my heart with like what i'm really feeling and people not telling me how i should feel and not always telling me what to do, i just need someone that just lets me talk sometimes you know and just listens - i've passed the honeymoon stage of being here and now life is happening, life is hard, it's hard to be this far from home and be so busy and trying to balance everything - so i will get through it, i just gotta keep pressing through - i've got the devil scared, i'm going in the right direction he sees me as a threat and he's trying to bring me down, but devil you are under my feet and Jesus came and overcame this world so you will not succeed in bringing me down!!

posted by Meliss @ 4:22 AM